A boy

This is the entry i wrote that i hate to re-read since it was too long to read.

July 10th, 2007 by jan012682

I’m going to tell you a story of a boy. A boy of my age, he’s around 25 years of age and living in a family that was used to be complete but now it’s not complete anymore. I will unnamed the boy, his identity will remain anonymous upto the end of the story. This boy, since then doesn’t fit to the world. When he started to knew things in this world, learn simple thoughts when he was a kid, simple words and simple living of life. He had been thinking of and wishing that "he wished not born in this world". Amazing it is that so many people wanted to live more than what they are expected to live. But this boy, doesn’t pray to live long. It is just a fact that this boy, once happy, it will be happy for the rest of the day and not thinking what would be tomorrow, he’s not a prodigal son of course. It is just that, he enjoy his life. When he was a little kid, he was praying to his God, that he would die early, because he was thinking that he was the reason why his family was suffering. He even blamed his God sometimes, for not hearing his prayers. Sometimes he felt that it would be better that he has no God, because he can do anything what he wants, but he was wrong, although he doesn’t have that strong faith with his God, he do still believe in his God, but most of the time having second thought that his God could not grant it most of the time and thinking, how can God answer his prayer, there are billions of people calling for his God. I know that most of the people in this world feel the same, but this boy is different. A very rare kind of a boy. Before, he was thinking of killing his self, but afraid to do it, did so many attempts but none progress. Now this boy is a grown up man, a young adult very strong, able to face the greatest trials in his life, can talk to strangers, can control anger. But what will happen if there is a single click change in this man’s life. It was a struggle when this man lost his father, let us say his father died in God’s plan as the Roman Catholic would say. A single death in the family, would mean a lot of change. A very irresponsible man, would be responsible? Would do things right, would decide perfectly? Nobody knows, only him could tell you when you meet this kind of person. This man has so many mysteries in life hidden, untold by him, and promised not to be revealed ’til he is living in this wildly enormous world of man. What i like with this man is that, he once told me that, he asked his God and prayed that "I pray to thee oh Almighty, that, let me the first person to die in our family, i don’t want to feel pain,sorrows of the lost of our family member, i want to give so much fun to my family and happiness, then you can get me". But he was so disappointed when his prayer never came true, for his father died first more than he does. And he wishes now, that his father would take him so that he would have no sufferings in this world no more. I know this man very well, and there are so many stories for him to be told, in fact i will be starting to write a story or his story on the middle of August. The book might not that be best seller of the time, but someday, somehow, someone will read it, able to understand it, that life was not that easy, life was full of mysteries, untold, like that of the high waves, deep oceans. Not ready to be discovered and not yet ready to be told…